Gun Control is a Four Letter Word

You cannot deny that America has a gun issue. It is so bad that when an active shooter does his thing the average American checks the body count before reading the article. 

The active shooter contingent of the population has evolved. Back in the day some guy would climb up on the Texas Tower with his tongue hanging out of his mouth and shoot everyone in sight. Audrey Hale arrived at school with a map, schedules, auxiliary weapons, and decided targets. And, you ask, why shoot the children? In the words of the helicopter gunner in the film Full Metal Jacket she didn’t have to give ‘em so much lead!

Boy! That hurt, didn’t it. I mean, not as bad as sitting on a bicycle without a seat, but right on up there. But, hang on, it gets worse. I’m sorry to be the first to tell you people, but there just ain’t no nice way to kill people. First we’re gonna need to set some parameters. 

Money Buys Everything!

Let’s take the first one. Money buys everything. In spite of your Biblical objections money does by everything. In the words of the Prophet John Lennon Money can’t buy everything it’s true, but what it can’t get I can’t use!

But Wilbur! Money can’t buy love. Maybe not, but if you’ve ever made a trip to Boy’s Town, Mexico for your senior trip you will be able to rent it! Where do you think these laws, rules, and legal misappropriations come from? Lobbyists buy congressmen and congressmen make laws. common sense has no part of this formula. Ronald Reagan said the most dangerous nine words in the English language are I’m from the government, and I’m here to help! When was the last time a CPS worker showed up to help you do the dishes? Money buys everything. Let’s move on. 

People Are No Damn Good!

The Apostle Paul tells us that all have fallen short of the glory. I’m no exception. When I used to go to confession I’d just have Father Ev read off The Ten Commandments and I’d up to the ones I’d broken that week. A few Our Fathers and a Hail Mary or too and I’d be good to go. You can freak off and be cool and be Catholic. I’ve always loved the ladies so when my confession became rather redundant I just became a Mormon and called it a day. 

We all have secret desires and life’s disappointments. Most of us just live with it and go on, but there’s a certain slice of society that just can’t “No!” for an answer. God talks to me. No, He really does. He always says, “No!” That’s because left to my ‘druthers’ I’d make Aleister Crowley look like the Pope. Wait, maybe not the Pope. Have you seen what’s coming out of the Vatican lately? But you see my point. Without law we’d all fall wayshort of that glory. Knowing the law is one thing. Obeying that law is quite another. But, more about that later. People are no damn good!

If you nail two things together that have never been nailed together before, you’ll get rich!

C’mon, we’ve all thought it. Man! If I could just come up with a flying Segway . . . And it happens every day only just not to you. I believe that we really are part of a Matrix. We have to be! The masters keep the ones who make it in one server, and the rest of us . . . well, HERE! You gotta keep ‘em sepaRATED!

Tie this one in with rule number one. If you nail those two objects together then you can buy everything, by selling the two objects to people who are no damn good! It all works together and we all really do live in a Yellow Submarine. So how do we pull all this toy and address the pandemic of mass shootings in America? Well I’m gonna tell you. 

One Thing

We have to first admit there is one thing wrong with our country. There are too many guns in the wrong hands in The Land of the Free. No, it’s not the police, sit your ass down! It is the people who have slipped between the cracks of normalcy and want to infect us with their problems. And if they can’t, well, they’ll just shoot ya! The simple logic is that we, as a society must find an equitable way to identify these people and separate them from our society. You must understand that not all of these people are crazy in the purest sense. Some are just plain mean! 

In identifying these malcontents we must be careful not to bring other groups that we don’t like into the subset who have nothing to do with the problem at hand. LBGTQs, immigrants, different races, and Democrats. The vast majority of these people do not get up in the morning planning to go to school and shoot up little kids. No matter how you may perceive a member of society always REmember that Billy the Kid never shot up a school! I’m not saying that I personally like all these groups, or what they stand for but let God sort ‘em out. For every disgruntled transgender popping rounds there is a irritated bank teller doing the same thing, and it doesn’t matter if they’re Muslim or Methodist, you’re just as dead!

Man Bites Dog

So, gun control is people control. I hate to say this again but Guns don’t kill people, people kill people! If we confiscated ever gun, knife, and stick in the country I swear before God, and several other old white men that you’d see a rash of toothpick murders. People are no damn GOOD! Drunk drivers kill people every day. One crippled me for life. Do we still have cars. You know we do. And we regulate them. It’s not perfect but can you imagine what the roadways would be like if we didn’t? 

Back when I was a kid in Shreveport a leash law was passed. Before that dogs were free range. As you walked the sidewalks you’d come across any number of mutts running up to you. Now, we were smarter in those days, and could read dogs better than folks these days, but the city took it upon itself to say that henceforth and forever more all dogs must be restricted in some fashion, either by fence or leash. And it would be nice if they had a rabies vaccination, but that was not required provided he was only biting you. You think fights start over gun control, you should’ve seen when those Cajuns had to leash their dogs. Jesus Christ, sitting next to God Almighty waiting on you to show up naked! It was five full years before all those mutts got tied up. Point of the story is one day I was checking my mail and a comely lass happened by walking her dog. I waxed nostalgic, remembering my childhood when the dogs ran free, peed on some things and bit the rest, and I thought what was in our crazy minds?

We have got to control access to guns by dangerous people. Things like background checks. What have you done that’s so bad you don’t want to have a criminal check run before you buy a gun? What have I done? Well, lots, but I can still buy a gun. Do you really want someone who just graduated from the Laughing Academy to own an AR-15? And don’t recite the Second Amendment to me or you Leftees try and parrot It’ll be like the Wild West. We have the Wild West from New York to LA right now and the active shooters are only getting better! And our forefathers certainly did not intend for out and out criminal to have the same access to guns as law abiding citizens. 

So what about Red Flag Laws? This one is touchy. Let’s look at Sandy Hook. Did you see that guy? Hey, I ain’t even gonna lie to you, I’d have shot Adam Lanza for general purpose, but I’m from Texas. This guy was a basket case and his mother went shooting with him? Had guns all over her house. She deserved to get shot. The kids didn’t! The whole neighborhood, if not the town knew Lanza was a screwball. Look at the hair! 

This is a prime example of common sense. Using cognitive reasoning. Yeah, yeah, yeah, Congress shall make no law . . . I know, but the Sheriff should have been able to tell mommy dearest I’m gonna take all your guns and Lock ‘em up in the evidence locker until you run Adam off, and if I catch another gun in your house until then I’m gonna slap you in the county jail!

So, what is the solution?

Ok, here’s the deal. America was built by depriving the rightful owners using guns. Yeah, I’m sorry. Live with it. Now we have what . . .three hundred and ten million guns in the United States and that’s just what we know about. That don’t count the Crips the Bloods and the Klan! You are never going to pick up all them guns. Also, if you tried you’d only get the ones owned by honest, law abiding citizens. Criminals, nuts, and active shooters don’t traditionally obey the law. 

There is a young lady getting off work at twelve midnight. She’s walking to the employee parking lot in the rear of the building. John T. Hornswaggle, recently released rapist at large who just left her store is waiting behind a dumpster to grab her and show her some love. But as he prepares to move he sees her hand in her shoulder bag. Is she holding her keys, or maybe something else? One from door number one or door number two.

This is our dilemma. When seconds count the police are minutes away. Why make schools a gun free zone when a majority of the teachers of of enough of a sound mind to have one. Or at least a retired vet to guard the front door. You have a guard at the bank, don’t you. What’s more important? Your money or you kids. 

Regulation and community common sense is good but gun control is a four letter word. It is a four letter word for all conservatives who fight for their gun rights and it is a four letter word for all the liberals who cry at the graves of little girls! An armed society is a polite society. The only answer to a bad guy with a gun, is a good guy with a gun. We need to stop being split as a society and stand up. If we don’t the predators will continue to prowl and we will continue to die! Door number one . . . or door number two!