The Pit and the Pendulum
Remember that pendulum I’ve told you about? Well, it didn’t go away. There was a study done way back on workers in a factory situation. I, myself have done time in Austin call centers, and I’m here to tell you, if you wanna see stressed out you don’t have to look much farther than a call center. The very nanosecond you end one call another one begins. And the caller has been hanging on the “call tree” like a Rhesus Monkey for a full minute. What could possibly go wrong?
Anyway, the study aforementioned was how to release the stress on someone who’s only claim in life was putting the left rear tire on a Chevy as it rolled by on an assembly line over, over, and over again. After much study it had been arrived upon to increase the lighting ever so slightly. And voila! Production increased ever so slightly. If a little light was good a little more would be a little better. Voila voila! More wheels on the deal. Cars jumped off the assembly line and America was basking in cinco cinco Chebies! Life was good! And The Lord said, “Let there be light!” Turn them all up! And General Motors was more brightly lit than the drunk tank in the Killeen City Jail!
So, there it sat. Then, ever so slightly production began to wane. Oh, there were explanations from corporate, especially the eggheads who’d spent all that company money on light bulbs, but the output kept going down until it was right back where it was in the beginning. What to do? After much deliberation the decision came upon to reduce lighting a bulb or two and the production began to inch back up. A couple more bulbs, more production. Until eventually it plateaued, and the process was repeated so on and so forth.
Why? Wouldn’t an abundance of light be good? I mean, if you could see the lug nuts better wouldn’t that be less stressful than black tires in dim light? Well, yes and no. The human mind looks for differences. Right or wrong doesn’t come into it, so long as it’s different. Not the same thing day after day. A lifetime with the same wife is all very holy but you have to renew all licenses every so often. What if, after four years or so, you opt for a newer model and not renew? Asking for a friend.
This applies to politics, sociology and KFC as well. The pendulum, just like the lights on the assembly line are better served by change. The political pendulum swings from right to left. It never sticks in the middle. One year the Supreme Court says anyone can marry anyone and the next year we are introduced to the word “nonbinary.”
Today I saw an article in Texas Monthly with two words that tweeted my interest. The kids could be the beginning of a conservative . . . That’s all I had to read. Didn’t even have to read the article. Just the words “Kids” and “Conservative!” Those fit together like someone asking you to “Please pass the piano!” But the rule of the pendulum applies. The “Z” generation, ie “Zoomers” have seen so crazy for so long that a little conservatism is, well, a bright light! I mean look at it. Just start with the pandemic that never was. You doctors sit your asses down. You knew viruses were smaller than the microscopic holes in those masks we were ordered to wear. You knew the coronavirus had been around since Jesus was a corporal, and you knew that some new “threat to end all life on earth” would come along and take its place. But you also knew there was some coin to be made here so you elevated this to Black Plague proportions, pulled the kids out of school and rolled in the profits. Results! An entire generation educated by a bunch of day drinkers. Thank you very much. And the kids went back to school, brought your super virus home and the elusive “herd immunity” just popped out of thin air. Ok, ok, grandma died. My grandma died three times when I was in the sixth grade. So you came up with Monkeypox! Shut the front door! So much disrespect for us you told us we could die from something called monkeypox? And where did monkeypox come from? Why gays, of course. It worked for Fauci back during the AIDS thing, didn’t it? Look what the gays are screwing now! Poor gays!
Remember the last big wave of COVID! I don’t remember its nickname, there were so many, Omatron or some crap. Anyway the grandkids got it. The next day I looked out my window and they were sledding down the hill in our front yard. It had snowed the day before. I ran out and yelled, “What are you doing? You have COVID!” They yelled back, “That was yesterday!” And just like that the magic went out of the Bat Virus of the century!
And all this was just one gas lighting pulled on the Zoomers. Then they were told to pick their own genders. That did ok for a while until Suzie Sweetcheeks took off her blouse in the back seat of that car that great grandpappy put the wheel on back in ’55. Viva Le Differénce! Then veggie burgers at Burger King. Do I really need to go on. And you are wondering why the Zoomer pendulum is swinging to the right. And the liberals are freaking out about the return of President Trump. After seeing what the country looks like under progressive thought it’s no wonder the TikTok generation is saying a resounding, “Hell Yeah!”
This is gonna happen boys and girls. The kids are alright. All the power is shifting with the pendulum. And all the whacked out ideas from the last generation will fall into the pit. And then, someday it will swing back again . . . lest we forget.
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